Misawa Air Base, Japan

Sadly, I don’t remember much about Misawa. Of course, I probably only went to three places total: school, American Video, and the BX. I hated school, so I don’t remember kindergarten or first grade. American Video provided wrestling videos.

The most memorable thing about the BX was the arcade. We lived there when Street Fighter II was released. Keep in mind I was five or six years old, so all I really knew how to do was follow directions. If only one player is playing with extra credits in the machine, the Player 2 side will blink “Press Start.” One day, I saw those two blinking words so I pressed start and wrapped my hands around the joystick, ready to dominate the sailor next to me.

But it wasn‚Äôt my quarter in the machine. So the sailor playing switched seats, apparently to play both sides. Greedy guy wouldn’t even let me lose to him. This was less than fifteen years ago, so it wasn‚Äôt the great depression or anything‚Äîa quarter was still ten cents short of a pack of gum. Being a rational adult dealing with a weird first-grader, he yelled at me. ‚ÄúWhat the hell‚Äôs wrong with you? That was my f‚Äôing quarter. What the f is on the joystick? Chicken grease?‚Äù Yes, yes it was. I ran away and hid between two other game cabinets.

Naval Air Facility Atsugi, Japan

I love Atsugi. There wasn’t much to do, but you don’t really notice that sort of thing in elementary school. Everything is alright as long as you can roller blade, avoid girls, and play tag with other boys. Luckily, I left before seventh grade. Following my brother’s footsteps, I’d be hopping trains and fighting my own gang members for honor.

Obviously, these weren‚Äôt real gangs. But there was some resemblance. They jumped members in. My brother tells me that he got jumped and took it like a man. Just cover your face. A new member was scheduled for initiation and my brother finally had his chance at jumping someone. But the new guy never showed up. You can‚Äôt get all the members fired up to kick a guy on the ground and then tell them it‚Äôs cancelled–you just can‚Äôt. So, according to the military-base gang constitution, the newest guy gets the opportunity to double his honor by taking another beating.

Oakland, California

This is the root of my cold, thuggish exterior. Actually, my family never lived in Oakland, but “I was born in Oakland” sounds a lot more rugged than “We lived in Sunnyvale.”

Seattle, Washington

I currently live here in my gigantic 9’x 9’ dorm room, my closet taking up a quarter of the space. It’s awesome

what about oak harbor!

i knoe ryte…you didn’t mention where real ballers originated…messed up..

haahaha yeah you played tag with jeffrey on the blacktop…i remember that…i always thought you were an f’ing loser

hey do you remember when we would dig tunnels in the playground sand? and we found a condom? hahahahaah me/you and dwinson i think…………..and we would like run water through the tunnels..we were tight

We dug to the bottom of the sand once, it had to be like four feet. On weekends, I used to wake up at sunrise, fill a jug of water up and head to the red top to dig. The next school year they mixed gravel in the sand and ruined our lives.

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